post #200: reawakened

I’ve slowly come to the realization that I took down my blog for the wrong reasons. I’ve spent the past few weeks pretending to redesign this thing, figure out a new direction. And while I did intend on doing that at some point, the real reason for stopping the flow of traffic was because I was ashamed of the craziness and immaturity expressed herein. I had met some new people in Memphis and thought, “My goodness, I sound like such a freak—better hide that, quick!”

I’m seeing now that I’m not the only crazy one. I’m quick to admit I have no idea what I’m doing in my life. I like to pretend I do, by being somewhat mature and responsible, having an 8-5 job and moving far from home and setting out on my own. But I haven’t a clue what I’m really supposed to be doing at any given moment of the day.

I don’t think I’m going to have those answers anytime soon, and not having my blog the past few weeks has dramatically injured my self expression. I’ve had no real outlet for my thoughts, feelings, worries. And while most people will be bored by my day-to-day ramblings, I know my close friends want to know what my days hold and what I’m experiencing without them. We get to talk far less than any of us would like, so this blog needs to stay the way it’s been all along.

For this, my 200th entry on WordPress, I’m bringing this blog back to life. I hope to incorporate more local flavor as I continue to explore Memphis as a whole. I hope to include more photographs and more from my daily ramblings on Twitter and elsewhere. I love Twitter, and I send at least a dozen of those lovely little 140-character updates a day, but I need this longer format for my sanity and for real information exchange with all my loved ones who don’t use Twitter.

I can’t promise this blog will be any more interesting than it’s been in the past. Nor will it be saner. But I’m fine with that. That’s me, and I’m sort of learning to be proud of that. Sort of. Stay tuned.

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2 Comments

Filed under blogging, thoughts

2 responses to “post #200: reawakened

  1. Did you actually take the site down? Those of us who read by RSS just figured you were on hiatus.

  2. e. autumne

    It’s been set to private for the past month or so, yeah.

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